Or, as the postscript to “The Lord’s Prayer” seems to threaten: “But if you do not forgive others their trespasses [their reckless and willful sins, leaving them, letting them go, and giving up resentment], neither will your Father forgive you your trespasses.” (Matt. 6:15, Amplified Bible)
Many times the offending party has no idea they’ve trespassed against you. Oftentimes you’re not even “on their radar,” so why forgive? Why not hold that grudge so you can slight them the next time they need a favor from you? Of course the facetious nature of such a rhetorical question exposes where my heart is: deep in the mire of unforgiveness.
And yet, Christ forgave all my sins; even those I’ve not yet committed. How is that possible? All of the sins I committed in the past before I became aware of His death on the cross to pay for my sins were, at the time He gave His life, in the future. Meaning, as long as I’m repentant, all my future sins are covered too.
Where is all this going? Who have I not forgiven? On Christmas Eve day, of all days! On the eve of the day we celebrate the coming of our Savior, all I can think about is whether or not my children’s mother is going to allow them to be with my family to celebrate with us.
A little history: since the very first Christmas with my (then) girlfriend in 1980, we figured the Lord worked out our potential challenge with where to spend Christmas, as her family always celebrates on Christmas Day, whereas ours has always done so on Christmas Eve. Problem solved, right? No. After our divorce in 1991, the best way to denigrate the relationship at this most blessed time of year seems to have been to deny that mutually beneficial arrangement.
Even now, sixteen years later, it’s unresolved. Our daughter is 20-1/2 years old, and our son 18; you’d think by now I would have figured out a way to preemptively forgive her for something that hasn’t even happened yet, right? I mean I’m a Christian for goodness’ sake! I recite and meditate on “The Lord’s Prayer,” though not as often as my Catholic brethren do.
Yet, the ire, stirring within my soul this day of days, bubbles with a heat that would be great preparation for Mac-n-Cheese, leading me to consider the fact I haven’t forgiven her (my apologies, even in the midst of an angst-ridden diatribe, I can’t resist a pun-laden metaphor for my eldest daughter and our shared love for this ‘delicacy’). Except, as the title hopefully conveys, as the Lord brings into remembrance, “His Prayer.”
Why would I need a passport? The Bible says we’re not of this world (Jesus said, “If you were of the world, the world would love its own. Yet because you are not of the world, but I chose you out of the world…” John 15:19) but rather ambassadors, as Paul describes our condition (“We are Christ’s ambassadors, and God is using us to speak to you.” 2Cor 5:20, New Living Translation).
The Bible says to renew my mind daily, as Paul says in his letter to the Romans, “I beseech you, therefore, brethren, by the mercies of God, that you present your bodies a living sacrifice, holy acceptable to God, which is your reasonable service. And do not be conformed to this world, but be transformed by the renewing of your mind, that you may prove what is that good and acceptable and perfect will of God.” – Rom. 12:2, New King James Version.)
Renewing the mind requires new forgiveness, especially when I feel an attack of guilt for not forgiving, even though Christ has already forgiven me.
As long as I live, I’ll never get used to the Lord answering prayers I’ve not even prayed; He, in His infinite wisdom, answers the unspoken prayers, before they’re even uttered. How so? Literally in the midst of writing this blog, my daughter Erika called to tell me that she and my son will be allowed to be at the Christmas Eve gathering at my parents house this year.
Though this would seem to make much of this missive unnecessary, especially about the frustration with past seasons of unrepentant anger leveled at my children’s mother, after reading the blog to my daughter on the phone, she convinced me that more good would come from this posting than not. So, as I ask forgiveness once again from my gracious Lord, He once again “stamps my passport,” allowing me continued ambassadorship to this world, as I seek to forgive those (I perceive to have) trespassed against me.
Jay
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